Last post of 07

So I realize I've probably lost all my readership on this thing since it's been over a week since my last post. I don't really care though, thats on you guys. I started my 3 weeks of winter break on friday and so I haven't had much interaction with lump since then (not to say that I had a ton while I was in school). I've decided to leave you all with this little anecdote before I start enjoying my vacation and sleeping in my room. alone.

My roommate is a bit like a child, as if you couldn't imagine. He needs a babysitter. You know how parents get baby sitters for their kids so they don't watch cartoons and eat oreos all day? Exactly. See with him it's like I go to class and when I come home I'm always surprised at what I find. It's like, oh hey buddy, how have you wasted the day? what kind of unproductive and wasteful activity have you gotten yourself into?! That's the roomie I know!

So anyways, I think this one happened on a weekend. Little preface here, the girls who live across the hall have kind of taken him in. When I say "taken him in" I mean it exactly how you think I mean it, like when some kind people take care of a stray animal who is usually a piece of shit with no manners or consideration. Damn, I made that analogy up as I went along and it's spot on! Back to the story. These girls are nice, I don't know why they waste their time with this guy, maybe because he gives them answers to homework? Except that couldn't be true because he's never done homework before....hmmm. I came home from somewhere and he's sitting watching something on the computer and he's got a mohawk looking like a half breed. He's like that kid who goes to the family values tour and then plops down in the back because he's too lazy to mosh and the sound hurts his ears. I don't know why I said he's like that - he is that kid.

This was a special occasion apparently because he actually left the building and drove his car to downtown santa barbara with these girls. God how I wish I could have been blessed to sit in that car enjoying awkward, demeaning conversation and a man reeling off snapple cap facts as if they held some merit. What left the building that day was not the same thing that returned. Mind you, this kid wore the same rotation of 5 shirts during the week (fyi, the week has 7 days in it), rarely did laundry and took naps with his shoes on. He was what I found...

Costume change ≠ Change of character

I wish I had a full body shot, I really do. He's wearing:

Track jacket that matches some Aqua VIIIs
White and purple block stripe shirt
Skinny black levis
High top chucks
...oh boy

I walked in and he had his head down, he said something along the lines of this... (he always does this actually. He asks some mindless rhetorical question that I can't answer because I don't care. And then he seems to have a counter response. Can you even do that? Like logically?)

"What did they do to me?"

I had it. I was like "Son, they didn't do anything. You're the one who spent 3 bills on clothes you don't like. Man up." Okay, so maybe it didn't come out exactly like that, but it was certainly along those lines. This shit got me thinking, what is going on in his head? He wears walmart blue light special jeans with some hand me down tees from his mom daily, how are you gonna switch up your style all drastic like? Are you a hipster now? What would jesus say? What would Serj from system of a down have to say? Are you appeasing these girls across the hall? Because I can tell you they honestly don't care what you look like, you're just a barbie doll to them. Calling you ken would be giving you wayyy too much credibility because that's my boy.

Honestly, I have to leave on that note. Dwelling on this topic is making me uneasy. I even had to go to the kid's facebook to get the picture and I saw some pictures of a get together he had in his hometown called the forest (or was it middle earth? I forgot). I'm out of here, hope everyone has a safe and merry holiday. As for me, I'm gonna take notes from my roomie and sit on the couch. All muthafuckin day.